unintended evolution

random musings, observations, comedic ravings, revelant inaccuracies, etc., etc... ------------ "In the depth of winter I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer." Albert Camus

Tuesday, June 29, 2004

Henry Wadsworth Longfellow-- Excelsior

Henry Wadsworth Longfellow. 1807–1882 . Excelsior
THE SHADES of night were falling fast,
As through an Alpine village passed
A youth, who bore, 'mid snow and ice,
A banner with the strange device,
Excelsior!

His brow was sad; his eye beneath,
Flashed like a falchion from its sheath,
And like a silver clarion rung
The accents of that unknown tongue,
Excelsior!

In happy homes he saw the light
Of household fires gleam warm and bright;
Above, the spectral glaciers shone,
And from his lips escaped a groan,
Excelsior!

"Try not the Pass!" the old man said;
"Dark lowers the tempest overhead,
The roaring torrent is deep and wide!"
And loud that clarion voice replied,
Excelsior!

"Oh, stay," the maiden said, "and rest
Thy weary head upon this breast!"
A tear stood in his bright blue eye,
But still he answered, with a sigh,
Excelsior!

"Beware the pine-tree's withered branch!
Beware the awful avalanche!"
This was the peasant's last Good-night,
A voice replied, far up the height,
Excelsior!

At break of day, as heavenward
The pious monks of Saint Bernard
Uttered the oft-repeated prayer,
A voice cried through the startled air,
Excelsior!

A traveller, by the faithful hound,
Half-buried in the snow was found,
Still grasping in his hand of ice
That banner with the strange device,
Excelsior!

There, in the twilight cold and gray,
Lifeless, but beautiful, he lay,
And from the sky, serene and far,
A voice fell, like a falling star,
Excelsior!

Day of the Dead, Forgeylicious (work in progress)

Today is the Day of the Dead, a day in which, according to Mexican tradition, we honor the memory of those family members and friends who died sometime during the last year. It is not a day of sadness nor of mourning. Rather, today is a day of remembrance and acceptance. A day for me to remember, my friend, Matthew Forgey Wells. A day to remember a lifetime of jokes with poorly, poorly timed punch lines. A day to remember a litany of cock-eyed philanthropic ideas that always seemed to start with the words, “Okay, first we win the lottery...Second....” A day to accept that Matt won’t ever dance on his thirty-third birthday. Today is a day to accept that six years of dance was enough.
Six years ago Matt’s body began to shake. Maybe it was more of a quake or a shimmy...whatever it was the doctors called it a seizure and gave it a French name, grand mal. And thus the dance began...
We, his friends, were there when the dance became violent, and we were there for the Fandango, the Waltz and even that bizarre period forever known to those of us who bore witness as the “summer of the fox-trot”. But I write these words not because of any of those dances. I stand here tonight to remember the day Matthew Forgey Wells danced for the Wu Tang Clan. Are you ready?
It’s not as though Matt had an actual list of things he wanted to do before he died, it’s more that he simply did all the things he wanted to do. He parachuted with his grandmother on her eightieth birthday. He joined Toastmasters to overcome his fear of public speaking while simultaneously dealing with his fear of death. Forgey felt as though the two were somehow connected. That, if he could conquer one he could conquer the other.
And, alas, Matt wanted to dance in a music video. This brings us to the Wu Tang Clan.
----------------- re-work this section ------------------------------
Matt worked for The Insurance Journal, a magazine devoted to the rock ‘n roll world of insurance. While on the job, Matt dressed like someone you might expect who works for The Insurance Journal: a uniform of Khaki pants and blue Oxfords--his Saddle shoes were his signature flare. Short on time, he wore his “uniform” to the audition. The others in the room wore black leather jackets, black leather belts, leather pants and shoes. Needless to say, not a Hindu in sight.
---------------------------------------------------------------
“Can you dance?”, that was the question. The question skeptically asked of Matt by a talent coordinator who looked remarkably like Debbie Allen of Fame fame, but who, after closer examination, was in fact not Debbie Allen of Fame fame.
She repeated the question. And then, using a technique frowned upon by his Toastmaster brethren and while flashing his trademark smile, Matt answered her question with a rhetorical question, “Can I dance?”
And he did. He danced his ass off.
Now, I wasn’t there but I’ve seen Matt dance. And I’ve seen Matt recreate that audition dance for us--many, many times (both in real life and in my memories and once even in my dreams, but that’s something for my therapist to hear about, not you people).
But back to the dance....
Imagine, if you will, a little bit of Sammy Davis with a dash Gregory Hines and just a hint, a distant echo of Elroy Hirsch, aka “Crazylegs”. With all the energy of the San Andreas and grace of Cary Grant, Matt danced. He danced for the Wu Tang Clan. He danced with the spirit. He danced until the Debbie Allen doppelganger asked him to stop. Matt danced as though his life depended upon it.
(pause)
Matt never heard back from the Wu Tang Clan...their loss. And I don’t suppose their approval was the point. It was about the doing; it was about the living; it was about THE DANCE. So when Nicole asked me if I could read something tonight, even though the very thought of doing so sent seismic quakes of fear through my body, the only words that seemed appropriate were, “Can I read?” (With all apologies to the Toastmasters)

O SWEET SPONTANEOUS by e.e. cummings

O SWEET SPONTANEOUS by e.e. cummings

O sweet spontaneous
earth how often have
the doting fingers of
prurient philosophers pinched
and poked thee , has the naughty thumb
of science prodded
thy beauty . how
often have religions taken
thee upon their scraggy knees
squeezing and
buffeting thee that thou mightest conceive
gods (but true to the incomparable
couch of death thy rhythmic lover
thou answerest them only with spring)


history of Pasadena

Pasadena, California--The Crown City-- was born, grew into “adulthood” and flourished due largely because of its climate and geographical location. “In New York, people are buried in snow. Here our flowers are blooming and our oranges are about to bear. Let’s hold a festival to tell the world about our paradise.” These words, uttered in 1890 by Pasadena resident Professor Charles Holder, were the genesis of Pasadena’s now legendary Tournament of Roses. Yet they could also be considered the bellwether remarks of a trend of emigration which led to the birth of the Crown City, its blossoming Golden age of the late 19th and early 20th century, and continues today more than a century later.
GEOGRAPHIC MAKE-UP Pasadena is located in the heart of the San Gabriel Valley, at the base of the San Gabriel mountains. These mountains, on a clear day, provide a picturesque and formidable background to the city. A mass of intrusive granite and covered in chaparral, the San Gabriel Mountains stand 5,000 feet tall. Though not massive by any standard, these mountains are rugged and have historically been uninhabited by homesteaders or recreational campers. The San Gabriel mountains, though uninhabitable, were and are critical to the creation and maintenance of the highly desirable Mediterranean climate. They are the primary source of water for Pasadena. Weather systems come in from the coast ushering clouds filled with evaporated moisture from the ocean. The water-laden clouds reach the foothills, they cannot go any further, and so dump their water in the foothills and Pasadena. Canyons and rivers were formed; damns were created. Water, and consequently life, came to Pasadena (Rees, 2003). These mountains would later prove beneficial in terms of communication and astronomy for they provide an unobstructed site for radio/television antennae and is the home of the world-famous Wilson Observatory. As we move down the foothills, onto the alluvial fan of the San Gabriel Valley, we see the geological result of being so close to a mountain range. The San Gabriel Mountains provide a steep run-off of water into Pasadena. Consequently, the run-off deposits sand, gravel, and fertile sediment in such a fashion as to promote the growth of citrus. Which, besides the mild climate, would be the primary draw of Pasadena. Citrus, specifically oranges, was a natural crop for Pasadena. The sandy soil is conducive to the growth of the trees, plus severe frost (an orange grove killer) is minimal in the San Gabriel Valley. In addition to oranges, Pasadena, in the Late 19th century also grew grapes for the production of wine and brandy. Although not of high quality, many Pasadena farmers became quite wealthy selling citrus and alcohol to the miners and settlers of northern California (Rees, 2003). Ironically, although alcohol aided in developing Pasadena as a city, a dislike of “ ‘ol John Barleycorn” was the primary factor in the establishment of Pasadena’s southern border. Apparently, many of Pasadena’s elite developed a dislike for the saloons of their fair city. These taverns lacked sophistication and attracted only the worst element. The owners of these establishments were harassed and harangued and eventually pushed southward. Thus the creation of South Pasadena (Page, 1964). Perhaps the only drawback to the geographic make-up of Pasadena is its location in a natural valley. The mountains which practically surround the city tend to trap not only the marine layer, which is good, but also pollution and stagnant air, which is bad. For Pasadena, smog is not a 20th century phenomenon. They are several well-documented reports of pollution in the San Gabriel Valley prior to the pre-industrial era. Rain in the winter, drought in the summer, fertile soil, Mediterranean climate, earthquakes, floods, smog, fabulous homes, annual fires that burn those homes, booze, wealthy socialites... Pasadena truly was the creation of nature and mankind.
INDIANS IN THE VALLEY Before the Europeans came to Southern California the area now known as Pasadena was inhabited by a clan of Shoshone Indians who called themselves the Hahamongas (a park in present-day northwest Pasadena, in homage, bears their name). The Hahamongas, a notably moral and spiritual clan of indians, lived in harmony with the land and with neighboring tribes. They were a small tribe (California never had any of the large indian confederations often found on the east coast) and were somewhat nomadic. However, archeologists have found remnants of six villages scattered from the foothills to what is today South Pasadena. They established a village near every viable water source. The Hahamongas were hunters and gatherers (no agriculture of which to speak), mostly they gathered, mostly the women gathered. Their diet consisted of the occasional rabbit or squirrel, some berries, some seeds, and a heavy helping of a mushy acorn creation common to most indian tribes of Southern California.
On January 17, 1770, in present-day South Pasadena, the Chief of Hahamongas, Chief Hahamovic, smoked a peace pipe with the Spanish governor, a man named Portola (again, if one wants to drink or smoke, South Pasadena is the place). Just one year later, Father Junipero Serra established a mission on the edge of the San Gabriel River and the Hahamonga would never again live as they wished or as they pleased. Within a few years, their culture began to die, asphyxiated by European ways. The Spaniards taught them the ways of agriculture, labor, punishment, disease, and Catholicism. Eventually, Chief Hahamovic married a European woman and, symbolically, put a period at the end of the story of the indians in the valley.
INDIANA IN THE VALLEY
In 1873, a small group of successful businessmen from Indiana began to consider a new venture. Their investments were hot, but their bodies were cold. Their solution? Go west. And west they came. Families with names like Berry, Eaton, and Wilson (names that still pepper the Pasadena landscape, followed by words like “street” and “canyon”). Together these men bought 4,000 acres on the east side of the Arroyo Seco and together they created The San Gabriel Orange Grove Association. Unofficially, they called themselves The Indiana Colony. They were successful in their start up, and by 1876 another plot of land just east of the original was sold for the purposes of growing citrus. The colony was a community. Only an official name eluded them. Originally, the founding fathers of the city wanted to stick with the name Indiana Colony. That notion, in order to eliminate any postal confusion, was summarily nixed by the United States Post Office (Page 1964). “Indianola”, someone offered. “Granada”, too, was suggested. Neither name seemed to match the poetic beauty of the valley. They wanted an indian word. They liked the idea of the San Gabriel Mountains sitting like a crown on the valley; others liked the idea of this city being the “key of the valley”. The men sought the help of a missionary-man from Wisconsin who had worked with Chipewa Indians and new their language. They sent him these ideas; he replied with five multi-multi-syllabic terms, each one ending with the syllables “pa sa de na”, meaning “of the valley”. In the name of brevity, the men agreed on “Pasadena” (Lund 1999).
The census of 1880 listed only 392 people living in the San Gabriel Valley; almost all of them refereed to themselves as “orchardists” (www.pasadenahistory.org). However, life in this little valley was about to change drastically. By 1885 word had gotten back to the east coast and Midwest, Southern California was a virtual Eden: seventy degrees in February, citrus and wine, fluffy clouds...heaven on Earth. In addition, this was the era of the railroad boom. Reliable transportation was the spark in the tinderbox. Property values and speculation almost literally exploded. With railroads becoming dependable one could travel from their summer home in Chicago to spend the winter Pasadena with relative ease. Railroads, improvements in irrigation, and subsequent advances in refrigeration also made Pasadena less of an economic gamble. Citrus growers had plenty of water to grow their product, plus they could package the citrus and ship it without fear of spoilage (Rees, 2003). Soon everyone from Portland, Oregon to Portland, Maine would be eating Valencia Oranges from Pasadena. Pasadena was blossoming. Interestingly, Pasadena became incorporated in 1886 for no other reason than to rid the city of the previously-mentioned saloon. By the 1890’s, the real-estate “boom” began to fizzle, but no one need worry; Pasadena was on the verge of her “Golden Era”.
THE GOLDEN ERA IN THE VALLEY Beginning in the 1890’s, the Pasadena citrus industry slowed down somewhat. Fortunately, for the economy, tourism replaced and surpassed those “orange” dollars. Luxurious resort hotels, such as the famous Green Hotel, were built. Pasadena’s roads were paved and lit at night, the city installed a sewer system installed. The Mount Lowe Railway, which brought tourists up into the San Gabriel Mountains, became popular for its incredible view of the valley. And on January 1, 1890 the members of the newly established Valley Hunt Club dressed up their horses and carriages with flowers and strutted their way through the streets of Pasadena while their brethren in “New York were buried in snow”. Close to 2,000 people witnessed this first “unofficial” Rose Parade (today, well-over two million watch the parade). Soon the parade itself would become a tourist draw. There were marching bands, a bronco-busting demonstration, ostrich races, and a race between an elephant and a camel (against the odds, the elephant won) (www.rosebowl.com). By the end of this “Golden Era” (1929) the city of Pasadena was nearly fifty years old and firmly established as a winter address of such high-brow families as the Wrigleys and the Huntingtons, Proctor and Gamble. It was also during this era that the landscape of Pasadena began to evolve, most notably regarding architecture, engineering, the arts, and education.
THE LANDSCAPE IN THE VALLEY As Pasadena became more and more associated with a high quality of living, the landscape began to change to meet those standards. Some changes of landscape were literal changes, such as stylish buildings and bridges, and some were intellectual, libraries and universities.
If one travels the streets of Pasadena in the year 2003 one can still detect the changes of the early twentieth century. There is the Gamble House overlooking the Arroyo Seco. A beautiful “Arts and Craft”-style home designed by Sumner and Henry Greene (Greene and Greene), who, like Frank Lloyd Wright (another architect to affect the landscape of Pasadena) , made painstaking efforts to build a home that would complement the natural environment. The Gamble House blends into the environment (Lund 1999).
Pasadena is a city built around canyons and rivers. Consequently, many bridges have been built. Most notably and most beautifully was the Colorado Bridge. A graceful crossing over the Arroyo Seco, this bridge has a somewhat colorful, if not morbid past. The “Golden Era” of Pasadena ended in 1929 with the beginning of the Great Depression. Like most American cities, Pasadena was hit hard. Many of her residents were ruined bankers and businessmen who chose end their lives by jumping off of the Colorado Bridge. So popular was this method of suicide that the bridge took the morbid nickname, “suicide bridge”, a name that has stuck till this very day. Local legend has it, that at the height of the Great Depression, gruesome pranksters actually painted a bulls-eye underneath the favorite “jumping off” spot of the bridge.
On a more positive note, the turn of the century saw the beginning of a focus on academia in the Crown City. The California Institute of Technology, on the shoulders of such noted scientists as Linus Pauling, reached a level of national prestige by 1930. The Mt. Wilson Observatory, in 1919, boasted the world’s largest telescope (100 inches). And Pasadena could brag that everyone of its residents lived within one mile of a library (www.pasadenahistory.org).
Perhaps the only drawback to the original landscape of Pasadena are the natural disasters: fires, floods, and earthquakes. As mentioned earlier, Pasadena experiences drought for most of the year. The foothills are covered with brittle and flammable chaparral. Fire is an annual hazard in the San Gabriel Valley. Prior to the 1940’s flooding was life or death matter in Pasadena. It does not rain much on Pasadena, but when it does, the rains are torrential. On New Years Eve 1934 Pasadena witnessed one of the worst floods in the history of the state of California. Many died, hundreds of thousands of dollars were lost. It was only then, after disaster, did Pasadena alter the landscape to prevent further disaster: dams were built and a river was artificially created (Rees, 2003). And finally, earthquakes round out the natural disaster trifecta. Pasadena lies near several active and dangerous faults (most active being the San Andreas and the Inglewood-Newport faults). Humans will never be able to prevent earthquakes, but Pasadena has been on the forefront of the study of seismology (Cal Tech) and developing architecturally sound buildings (The Art Center of Design).
Whether it be the Hahamonga tribe of Shoshone Indians, or wealthy orchardists from Indiana, or vacationing chewing gum heirs from Chicago, or the world’s most famous and influential architects and engineers, hundreds of thousands of travelers have been lured to this little valley in Southern California by its mild Mediterranean climate like moths to a flame, or more accurately like the cold masses to a warm front.




WORKS CITED
Lund, Ann Scheid (1999). Historic Pasadena. San Antonio: Historic Publishing Network.
Page, Henry Markham. (1964). Pasadena: Its early years. Los Angeles: Morrison Printing and Publishing.
Rees, Dr. John. (2003). Lecture from Geography 432, Metropolitan Los Angeles. California State University at Los Angeles.
www.pasadenahistory.org. February 24, 2003.
www.rosebowl.com. February 24, 2003.


























Pasadena, the First Fifty Years:
Peaks and Valleys
Christopher F. Lewis
Geography 432
Dr. John D. Rees
March 13, 2003

quotes

"If you can walk you can dance. If you can talk you can sing." - Zimbabwean Proverb

"Ability may get you to the top, but it takes character to keep you there." - John Wooden

"I know of no more encouraging fact than the unquestionable ability of man to elevate his life by conscious endeavor. " - Henry David Thoreau

"What lies behind us and what lies before us are small matters compared to what lies within us." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

"The earth has music for those who listen." - William Shakespeare

"It is not the strongest of the species that survive, nor the most intelligent, but the one most responsive to change." - Charles Darwin

"There is no better way to thank God for your sight than by giving a helping hand to someone in the dark." - Helen Keller

"The best portion of a good man's life is his little, nameless, unremembered acts of kindness and of love." - William Wordsworth

"If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put the foundations under them." - Henry David Thoreau

"Don't walk in front of me, I may not follow; Don't walk behind me, I may not lead; Walk beside me, and just be my friend." - Albert Camus

"To awaken each morning with a smile brightening my face; to greet the day with reverence for the opportunities it contains; to approach my work with a clean mind; to hold ever before me, even in the doing of little things, the ultimate purpose toward which I am working; to meet men and women with laughter on my lips and love in my heart; to be gentle, kind, and courteous through all the hours; to approach the night with weariness that ever woos sleep and the joy that comes from work well done -- this is how I desire to waste wisely my days." - Thomas Dekker

"You can do very little with faith, but you can do nothing without it." - Samuel Butler

"Henceforth there will be such a oneness between us -- that when one weeps the other will taste salt." - Source Unknown

"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did. So throw off the bow lines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover." - Mark Twain

"In seeking wisdom, the first stage is silence, the second listening, the third remembrance, the fourth practicing and the fifth teaching." - Solomon Ibn Gabirol

"To be what we are and to become what we are capable of becoming, is the end of life." - Robert Louis Stevenson

"It is curious that physical courage should be so common in the world, and moral courage so rare." - Mark Twain

"We must build dikes of courage to hold back the flood of fear." - Martin Luther King, Jr.

"The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams." - Eleanor Roosevelt

"One important key to success is self-confidence. An important key to self-confidence is preparation." - Arthur Ashe

"The human mind, once stretched by a new idea, never regains its original dimensions." - Oliver Wendell Holmes

"To hope means to be ready at every moment for that which is not yet born, and yet not become desperate if there is no birth in our lifetime." - Emily Dickinson

"To accomplish great things, we must not only act but also dream. Not only plan but also believe." - Anatole France

"The timeless in you is aware of life's timelessness; and knows that yesterday is but today's memory and tomorrow is today's dream." - Kahlil Gibran

"One word frees us of all the weight and pain in life... and that word is love." - Sophocles

"Be yourself; no base imitator of another, but your best self. There is something which you can do better than another. Listen to the inward voice and bravely obey that." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

"Where there is an open mind, there will always be a frontier." - Charles F. Kettering

"When it's time to die, let us not discover that we have never lived." - Henry David Thoreau

"Though we travel the world over to find the beautiful, we must carry it with us or we find it not." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

"Those who would give up essential freedoms for security, deserve neither freedom nor security." - Benjamin Franklin

The greatest enemies of us alcoholics are resentment, jealousy, envy, frustration, and fear. Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, To Employers, pg. 145


"From what we get, we can make a living; what we give, however, makes a life."
-- Arthur Ashe


"There is nothing like returning to a place that remains unchanged to find the ways in which you yourself have altered."
-- Nelson Mandela

"I dwell in Possibility"

Emily Dickinson's "I dwell in Possibility"

I dwell in Possibility--
A fairer House than Prose--
More numerous of Windows--
Superior--for Doors -
Of Chambers as the Cedars--
Impregnable of Eye--
And for an Everlasting Roof
The Gambrels of the Sky--
Of Visitors--the fairest--
For Occupation--This--
The spreading wide my narrow Hands
To gather Paradise--

Saturday, June 26, 2004

from March 13, 2003

Hello all,
Enough is enough, I've been sitting on the sidelines
for far too long. It's about time I take a stand
regarding international relations. I'm getting in the
game...

I just finished reading an article about the Rolling
Stones and their upcoming tour in China. Apparently,
the boys at the Chinese Ministry of Culture (truly a
fun bunch of guys if there ever was one)have forbidden
Mick et al from performing the songs: "Brown Sugar,"
"Honky Tonk Women," "Beast of Burden," and "Let's
Spend the Night Together". Too sexually explicit they
say, and get this, they're not particularly fond of
"Brown Sugar" because it promotes
inter-racial lovin'.

Yee-haw!! I loves me the censorship. It always seems
so random and superficial. For example, they can't
play a rather innocuous song such as "Let's Spend the
Night Together" (...and by the by, why is this song
offensive to the Ministry? You don't get a country
with one billion people without spending a few nights
together), however they can sing "Street Fighting
Man", a song that glorifies violence. They can sing
"Mother's Little Helper", a universal speed-freak
anthem. And they can sing "Sympathy for the Devil",
which promotes, well, sympathy for the devil.
So--according to the Ministry of Culture-- violence,
drugs,
and compassion for Lucifer, that's okay. But a little
sexuality? No, no, we'll have none of that. Which
brings up another point. Are these guys making their
decisions based solely on lyric content? Because
quite frankly Keith Richards' guitar riff in
"Satisfaction" has enough sexual potency to impregnate
an entire Cantonese village. And what about "Start me
Up"? The Ministry has okayed that song. I don't know
about you, but when I hear that song I'm not exactly
thinking about DieHard batteries or the start of an
Arena Football League game. That song is about
sex...in any language.

I guess what I'm saying to the Ministry of Culture is
don't invite the Rolling Stones to your country and
tell them not to be sexual. Just like you don't ask
the Jehovah's Witness to come over, if you don't want
them to try to convert someone. Just Like you don't
ask Al Gore to be your presidential nominee if you
want
to win. You just don't.

There, that's it...I said it. And I feel better for
it. In these crazy times of terrorism, war, and Fred
Durst a man has to stand up and be counted.

Sympathy for the devil,
Christopher


from Dec. 8, 2003

Allo, allo, allo,

I realize this is short notice, however tomorrow
(Tuesday the ninth) could be an historic day in
America.

San Francisco is having its run-off election for
mayor, featuring--of all things-- a Green candidate.

Granted the candidate, Matt Gonzalez, is the underdog
(he received 20% of the vote compared to Gavin
Newsom's 40% in the first election), but you never
know. America has never had a major city with a Green
mayor (unless you count Santa Monica... which I
don't).

If you get this message in time and you feel inspired
and you know a registered voter who lives in San
Francisco perhaps you might give them a call and
persuade them to vote for Matt (I have found that
either bribery or blackmail are most effective).

Some reasons to vote for Matt:

1. He's endorsed by the following:
BANDS AGAINST BUSH, BAY AREA (BABBA); Jello Biafra;
Dick Clark (not the yahoo from American Bandstand);
Danny Glover (admit it, you loved him in Operation
Dumbo Drop); Bob Weir of The Grateful Dead and Ratdog;
Rod Donald, Member of Parliament, New Zealand (for
stronger Bay Area-Kiwi relations); Teachers 4 Change;
S.F. Taxi Permitholders and Drivers Association (you
don't want to piss these guys off); DogPac (whose
website, www.dogchurch.org , bills itself as the
"Virtual Church of the Blind Chihuahua"); San
Francisco Motorcycle and Scooter Coalition; San
Francisco Bicycle Coalition; National Organization of
Women, California; Art Agnos, Former Mayor of San
Francisco.

2. Sound environmental policies such as: "Protect the
natural and use values of the Hetch Hetchy water
system" (I'm not exactly sure what this means, I just
like typing the words "Hetch Hetchy").

3. His ideas for improving education include smaller
class sizes and "recognizing the centrality of art in
a well-rounded education." Also, he never mentions
nor alludes to the notion that more computers in
classrooms would somehow resurrect the schools of
America from their abysmal state.

4. He has a proposal to make the city more bicycle
and pedestrian friendly... Amen brother!!

5. Did I mention, he's endorsed by Danny Glover, star
of Escape from Alcatraz.

Reasons not to vote for Gavin Newsom:

1. He's endorsed by Al Gore.

"Gore said he felt comfortable endorsing Newsom
because the candidate's studied style of leadership
mirrors his own." (www.gavinnewsom.com)

Yikes!! This guy thinks a comparison to Al Gore is a
positive thing. That's like comparing yourself to
plain yogurt.

2. His name is "Gavin".

C'mon, who's your Mayor, a guy named Matt or some
social butterfly named Gavin?
Besides, since the dawn of time, there has been only
one truly honorable man named Gavin: Gavin MacLeod
aka Captain Merrill Stubing of the Pacific Princess
aka The Love Boat.

Until tomorrow...

God Bless America,
God Bless Danny Glover,
and sucks to Gavin Newsom.

It ain't easy being Green,
Chris

retraction

I must apologize to William Mulholland and his family
for wrongfully linking him with the likes of Fred
Eaton. Eaton was a weasel who profited immensely and
criminally by passing himself off as a federal
official (which I thought was a crime, but I guess
not).

Mulholland, who was Eaton's partner, did not profit
from the aqueduct in any way other than his government
salary. In fact, William Mulholland was, at best, a
bona fide genius and, at worst, an engineering geek.
He was famous at parties for his ability to commit to
memory the entirety of the Los Angeles water works
system. If asked, he could tell you the exact size,
width, and length of any pipe under any street in Los
Angeles.

And yet, even greater than that accomplishment, he
engineered the aqueduct--the longest of its kind at
the time--and got it done on time and under budget.

Finally, and the primary reason for this retraction,
William Mulholland, was a bit of a tragic hero. In
1928, one of the dams he built, the St. Francis Dam
near Piru, burst. Sending water, debris, and thousand
pound chunks of cement tumbling through the Santa
Clara valley and towards the Pacific Ocean, over 50
miles from the dam. Five hundred people died.
Everyone, including the man himself, blamed Mulholland
for the tragedy. He died believing he was
responsible.

In 1992, a geological survey team determined that the
dam broke for reasons beyond Mulholland's control
(something about an ancient landslide or something
like that).

So, I write all this so that William Mulholland's name
not be besmirched again by being linked unkindly to a
money-grubbing, amoral, puss-bucket like Fred Eaton.

American Idle

Alright, I don't have much time (I have a mid-term in
my LA History class waiting for me in just about two
hours) so I'm going to make this quick.

If this American Idol "controversy" doesn't fade away
into pop culture oblivion within the next week I'm
going to lose it and lose it in grand fashion, my
friends.

Much to my chagrin, I awoke this morning to the vision
of Elton John claiming the talent contest to be ripe
with racism. Fans of Fantasia (the girl not the
Disney 'toon) cried both tears and fowl. So much
passion! You would have thought an election had
mistakenly elected the wrong American President, not
the wrong American Idol. Which leads me to my next
point of ire...
Four years ago, America experienced a constitutional
crisis based on the fact people couldn't figure out
which hole to punch. Does it come as any surprise
that the "dial 1-800-###-#### for your favorite
contestant" method came up woefully short?

If Sir Elton or any fan of fair play wishes to discuss
conspiracies, how about William Mulholland and Fred
Eaton's plan to "obtain" the rights to the Owens River
under the guise of being federal officials, and what
about the LA Times/aqueduct connection, and what about
the...the...oh, that's right, I should be studying
right now.

Wish me luck,
Chris

P.S. Oh yeah, you want to talk racism, Sir Elton?
How is it that taxpayers managed to pay reparations to
the farmers of the Owens Valley for lost crops due to
lost water. Yet we enslave a race of people and to
this day they nor their ancestors have received dime
number one. And what about...